The Pain After the Break
by WhiteWolf535
Summary: The process after the departure seems never-ending until the dull aching ends... Whenever that happens.   Expect much angst-paste. Also, the ending is kind of up to the reader since there are diffrent ways you can take it.


**This is not my best but its not toooo bad so I decided to post it.**

**I've been in a mood lately... like this was meant to be an adorable, fluffy Nick and Ellis fic! But then it turned into a saaaad angsty thing! D: **

**I think I need to take some happy PILLZ! :D**

* * *

The cheery sunlight filters through the window and lands on the tussled white sheets of a large, king sized bed. Stretched across those sheets is a man in his early twenties. A blue and white hat rests on his callused finger tips. His chest, covered by a worn yellow shirt with faded lines of a strange carnivores plant amongst the words, 'bull-shifters', rises and falls at a slow pace. The young man's lower body is covered by loose overalls tied at his hips by their sleeves. His face is framed by curled brown locks, pressed to the top of his head thanks to his loyal hat. Finally, bright blue eyes stare, half lidded at the ceiling. He's on the verge of sleep thanks to the warm blanket of sunlight which shrouds his spread out body.

The blue pools eventually close, a small tear slipping from the corners of his eye as he finally surrenders to some much needed sleep. As soon as he closes his eyes however a smooth whisper invades his hear, "Now what are you doing here all by yourself Ellis?" The blue eyes burst open and the young man props himself up on his elbows, only to find a shining figure meet his surprised gaze. Ellis stares in utter shock at the white wearing creature standing casually beside the bed. Calmly amused green eyes lazily meet his wide blue orbs. The being's white jacket glows in the sunlight while a soothing shade of blue gives the eyes a break from the white-suit attire that this new man is wearing. Slick, dark brown hair seems to even out this older man's image.

The young man can't seem to stop his speechless staring. Eventually the white-wearing figure makes the first move. He bends in half at the waist and rests the fingertips of one hand on the fluffy covers of the bed while he leans his head closer to the young man, bringing his other hand forward to touch Ellis's cheek. Immediately at contact, the smaller man's eyes fall shut again and he lets out a small, cracked whisper of his own, "Nick…"

The fingers on his cheek feel real, they feel like the usual feather-like touch the conman reserved for his body. The southerner shudders as his eyes clench tight. Small drops of salt water start to trickle down from the corners of his eyes. They slip past his defenses, the weak mental barriers made of lies just to make the crying stop. But they didn't help.

The digits on his skin become a little more firm as they frantically wipe away the tears. The voice comes again but this time it sounds panicked, concerned, and worried all at once, "Ellis, please stop. Please, you know how I hate to see you cry. Relax, I'm here now." The southerner's heart aches with each ragged beat. He sobs and his head falls forward only to find that another forehead is there to catch him.

His small yet strong fame lurches forward with each sob even as muscled arms wrap themselves around him. Ellis's hands clutch at the white fabric of the conman's jacket. Nick rubs the young man's back and whispers soothing words to the mechanic in hopes of stopping this onslaught of tears. But they keep seeping forth, it's no use.

Ellis pulls his head from where it was tucked neatly under the gambler's head to press his tear soaked lips to the conman's. The moment was stiff for a moment; apparently Nick wasn't expecting this sudden kiss. But Ellis is relieved when the warm mouth presses back.

Heat spreads throughout the mechanic's body while a warm and familiar build settles onto the bed beside him, urging him to lie down so that it can try and calm him down. Ellis wraps his arms around the gambler's neck while two forearms rest on either side of his head and a chest presses against his. The heated lips against his move in their usual, hypnotizing way. The tears keep on flowing but he keeps up the kiss while his fingers comb through the slick hair even as he hiccups into the comforting lips. He is miserable.

This almost feels real. With this thought the head lifts up from their embrace despite all of the southerner's attempts to keep it still. Ellis's watery blue eyes stare blurrily into the sympathetic eyes of this southerner's lover. The painfully truthful voice hits him; no matter how many times his head begs it not to, "… You can't keep doing this, El… _this isn't real, you can't bring me back_."

The southern mechanic shakes his head vigorously in his denial and cries out loud, "no… s-stop… let me have yew a little longer! Don't l-leave me like this! P-Please!" His fingers clutch the back of the larger man's jacket. He won't let go. He can't let go. Nick's own green orbs shut tight at his partner's agony but he starts to get up, tugging on the smaller man's hold. The creature in white can't stay. He can never stay for long.

Ellis tightens his hold on the other man and pleads between bubbly whimpers, "no! Nick don't! Don't leave me! I love you! I love yew so much!" His lips capture the steadily rising gambler in a desperate attempt to convince the man to stay. But a cruel, ringed hand presses against his chest, prying him from the body which he holds so dearly; faintly he feels the fingers lightly tug on his shirt as if they desperately want to stay but eventually they disappear from his realm of senses. He grunts as his back hits the mattress but after half a second of pause the small southerner props himself up again with his clear blue eyes wide. But the white figure is already gone.

There are a few seconds of silence where his blurred orbs look at the space his partner once occupied. His grief returns with a sudden wail as his tattooed arm comes up to cover his eyes. His body falls limp as he cries loudly into the empty room.

Only one, soft whisper seems to break through his depression, "_you are strong; you will live through this…"_ These supposedly comforting words only bring even more tears. It seems to hesitate a moment as if it were trying to gather the strength to continue, "_I love you too…_"

Ellis curls into himself while his fingers entangle themselves in the sheets. His face hides in the smooth white fabric and he waits for his tears to cease. He waits for his sniffling to stop and the stains to dry so that the process can start once again for the loss of the smart-ass smirk which used to comfort him even through the worst of times, the loss of the slick hair which felt so good between his fingers, the loss of the body which kept him warm and gave him comfort during the blight of flesh eating monsters, the loss of his best friend and the love of his life… the loss of Nick, the man who left him to face this goddamn world alone.

* * *

**lol review make the world go round but I don't expect many people to read this, like it and then review xD **

**I've never done a hurt/romance thing before so idk how popular it is... anyway~ yeah, review and tell me what yew thought!**

**-WhiteWolf**


End file.
